Motivation

One of the hardest things in the world to come by is motivation. Its like oil, its a resource we are running out of and only comes in short supply. Motivation is something we have to refill ourselves with every single day of our lives. Motivation is also totally different for everyone. We are all motivated and inspired by a variety of things. I am always motivated by other peoples successs stories. You all have read mine but let me tell you about who and what inspires me.

The people that inspire me daily are the people who come into my gym everyday. When I scan their cards in there is a picture of the member on the computer and seeing the differences from the day they joined to today always makes me smile. Some of these people are are like me, they have lost half of themselves and never miss a day. Others are super human. They hit the gym at 6am, put in 2 hours and then head to an 8 hour day of week...now that is dedication! Like every want to be trainer I love and idolize Jillian Michaels. She is the one person on tv who I see and want to be like. I read her books and she seems to be the only person who gets what all of this is about. She was overweight at one point and has turned her success into a living just like I want to do.

I have to admitt that TV shows have inspired me along the way. We all know the amazingness that is The Biggest Loser. I am also completely addicted to MTVs I Used to Be Fat. Watching that show is what made me want to be a trainer. There was one episode about an over weight teen who had no family, very few friends and the bond that he built with his trainer was amazing. I saw that and knew that I wanted to have that kind of impact on someone's life. I wanted to teach them the tools I learned. I wanted to give them the gift I gave myself.

My newest inspiration I stumbled upon this evening. Laying in bed on complete vocal rest I was playing on Netflix and found the show Heavy. This show is about people who are morbidly obese going through a 6 month life overhaul. All of these stories were so inspiring and real. People come in weighing 600 lbs and at the end have worked their asses off and some shed as much as 200 lbs. They laugh, they cry, they sweat, hell they even hide peanut butter in their closets. These stories are real and relatable. Ronnie's story really hit home for me. By the end of the show he lost 180 lbs and then tries to run a minute on the treadmill for every pound he lost. And HE DID IT!!! Not only did he run 15 miles over 3 hrs he inspired the head of the fitness center to run with him! That got me! New goal for me, one minute for every pound I've lost! 150 minute run here I come!

Motivation can be hard to come by but when it hits you it hits hard. Whether your motivation is your children. If you get inspired by someone else's success, or if TV shows and movies motivate you to over haul your life. Once you become motivated that's your key to success. Keep that idea tucked away in your back pocket and pull it out on a bad day. I've started keep a notebook with stories, pictures and songs that inspire me. I write down my goals so I never forget them. Keep them posted where you can see them and remember why you're doing this. My newest goal: (other than 150 minute run) The Boston Marathon is in 162 days. I want to run a half marathon before then and in April 2013 maybe run the marathon myself.  What's your goal? Let me know!
Love,
A. 

Confessions

Its been a while since I've posted a blog and the reason is simple. Its not because I've been busy, its not because I forgot. Its because I couldn't give advice and rant about being healthy when I haven't been. I haven't been taking care of myself the way I need to. I haven't been healthy like I tell everyone to be. I've been over training and over induldging and then I train more to compensate. There is a fine line you skirt when you workout like I do. I love running, I love hittting the gym but that too can become an addiction. But my bordering exercise addiction is only half of my confession. Lately I haven't been happy. You can only see clarity about unhappiness when you finally become happy.  I've been dealing with personal stuff and when I'm hurt or sad I tend to over train. When I was over weight I would over eat but now I punish my brain and heart for my feelings by running 30 some miles a week.

So I'm trying something new. I'm starting over. I feel like for so long my training and exercising has been the center of my life. I want it to be fun again. So I'm taking a break. I'm giving myself 7 days to be lazy, to go out, to have fun with my friends and try new things. Its time for a reality check.  I'm not going haywire on my diet. I'm still sticking to my regular plan, calorie counting and all but my body needs rest. When you over train you become exhausted, you're more prone to injury and you eat too much because you need to replenish the calories you've burned. I'm going to hit the refresh button and remember that this is my one and only life and I need to do more than obsess about my body.

I hope you guys forgive me for being human. I'm flawed but maybe you can learn from my mistakes. I'm trying to. Everyone have a safe and happy Halloween weekend!
Love,
A.

Falling Off the Wagon

We've all done it. We've all stood in the kitchen and cleaned out the cabinets or emptied the fridge. We've all eaten a whole carton of ice cream, a whole bag of chips or my personal posions: peanut butter crackers and trail mix. Some of us feel like we're finally full, some feel guilty, some feel sick and some take this small slip as defeat and just give up on their diet entirely. Don't let one day of slipping up defeat you. Its a minor set back. We are human we are all going to have good days and bad days. Especially as women there are going to be days when we eat everything and days when we don't want to eat anything. The joys of riding the hormone roller coaster. If dieting and dealing with our cravings was easy then the whole world would be thin. Obviously the whole world isn't thin so we have to learn to cope. The hardest part is picking yourself up and hopping back on the wagon. Too many of us just give up and quit when the going gets tough. We all know that the things we have to work hard for are the things worth having. My little tricks of the trade in dealing with cravings vary depending on the craving. First you have to determine if you're really hungry or if you're just bored, emotional or something else. Some experts say to imagine eating a steak, if that sounds appealing to you then you're actually hungry so you can eat. Well, i hate steak so that doesn't work for me. My trick is drinking a large glass of water quickly. I do this for two reasons: 1) our bodies constantly confuse hunger and hydration. Hydrating can curb hunger and cravings 2) if you drink water quickly you get full quickly. Then you don't over eat or give into cravings as much. The best thing to do is to find healthy alternatives to your favorite things. The Hungry Girl cookbooks are my personal favorite. So many snacks and mini meals with 200 calories or less. I have so many healthy alternatives I could have another blog just dedicated to those recipes. If you want some options just email me at annieweir09@gmail.com and i will send you some. Basically what I want you to take away from this is there are healthy ways to cope with cravings and that just because you slip up doesn't mean you should give up on your goals of losing weight. Believe me I slip up all the time. Just ask my friends, they will give you one word... Nutella! That says it all right there. Love, A.

Through the Years

The Secret...

The main question I get every day from people, mainly women, who've heard my story is: "Oh my God! What's you're secret?!?!?" All of these women are dying to know how I lost half of me. They all want to hear a quick fix. They want the easy answer, a simple escape strategy. They want me to perform a miracle and make them instantly lose 10, 20, 100 pounds. Ladies (and the occasional gentleman) IT'S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN! You're not going to take a pill, have surgery or wish your way thin. It's impossible and you're fooling yourself if you think you can attain anything by sitting on your ass. The answer to this question isn't the newest fad diet, it isn't some crazy cleanse. It's what doctors, trainers and other health professionals have been beating you over the head with since the dawn of processed food...eat healthy and exercise. Its not a diet its a "change in lifestyle". Its not a gimic its true! We all know that its the truth we just don't want to hear it. We're Americans, we want the quickest, easiest way to everything! Why do you think processed foods were invented and why do you think they are stocked to the brim at convience stores, snack machines and snack bars? Because they're cheap and easy to make. They're quick and easy to grab as we munch our way through life.

Easy and quick should be taken out of your vocabulary when it comes to your health. Would you ask the doctor giving you an exam to do the "fastest and most simple" exam if you knew there was something wrong with you? NO! And if you're overweight, you know you're overweight. You look into the mirror everyday and you look back at yourself. If you're okay with the person that looks back at you great! Im still not always happy with the woman looking back at me. Now ask yourself can I be healthier? Will my diet and activity level let me live as long as I want? Will it help me live the life I deserve? That answer is up to you. In February of 2010 for me, the answer to that question was one big "HELL NO!" I was 23 years old and I felt like death all the time. I was sad and depressed daily. There were days I woke up tired from doing nothing the day before. There was something truly wrong with that. So I changed, it was a slow process but when it comes to a dramatic change "slow and steady wins the race".

The main thing Im trying to say today is you've got to want it! You've got to know that being healthy and in shape (notice i don't say skinny) is going to be hardwork! But everything that is worth anything in this life is hardwork! You've got to try because no one can do it for you, no one can make you. You also have to know you deserve it! You deserve to be the best you that you can be. You deserve to be healthy, happy and beautiful! That's a big lesson I had to learn. That I deserve this body! I deserve to be happy and healthy. I deserve the best out of each day that I live. That's the first big step in any change, knowing you are worth all the sweaty, bloody (sometimes hungry) moments that will make you the person you want to be! I promise you that you are worth it. It took me 23 years to figure that out. Hopefully you will start to see it too.
Love, A.

I'm giving in....

So for the past year or so my friend, Jenn has been telling me I just had to create my own blog. I only sort of wanted to but it felt like it would be another chore that I would have to keep up with all the time. Another site and app to add to my already full smart phone. I knew I had a story to tell, one that could help others as well as myself. So for the first time in years I started to journal again and finally decided I should listen to Jenn and give in. I would blog about my 7 year long transformation from a 300 pound teenager to a complete and total health and wellness freak. What's the worst that could happen? No one reads this, well then I will just stop writing.

I guess I have to give you a little bit of background on how I became the girl everyone affectionately...well meanly called Shamoo or Tons of Fun. I had a pretty sad childhood. My dad was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis (MS) when I was a kid and was sick the majority of my childhood until he passed away in 2001. To say I was an emotional eater is probably an understatement. We all know that food is a comfort, it makes us feel better when you're sad. Sugar and caffeine can make anyone perk up when they're down. It also was the one thing I could control in a completley out of control enviroment. Since my dad was sick my mom worked around the clock to provide for us and since we were kids all we wanted to eat was crap! Of course that is totally fine because the crap food, the highly processed food with ingredients I can't even pronounce...those foods? Well they're cheap as dirt! (I'll blog about that later) Since we were on a budget the cabinets were always full of this cheap stuff. Frozen pizzas, Doritos, Pepsi, Ramen noodles, cookies, Mac & cheese. If its bad for you, I ate it and ate a ton of it!! I will never forget the day I joined Weight Watchers and they showed me what a real portion size was. I was a girl who could scarf down a whole Wendy's triple cheeseburger and fries and a soda. I could eat an entire box of mac and cheese and want more. When I learned that a 1/2 cup of mac & cheese was a serving and 300 and some calories I was floored to learn that I was taking in almost all of my daily calories in one sitting!

With the stress of my home life,the lack of healthy (and cheap) options and all around ignorance is it any wonder I was tipping the scale at around 300 pounds and rocking a size 24 jean? Things got even worse after my dad passed away. For about a year I dipped head first into any food that reminded me of my childhood. I remember the week my dad was in the hospital for the last time the only foods I would touch were the worst ones. I would eat boxes and boxes of mac and cheese and drink gallons of kool aid. These were foods that reminded me of being a kid and they comforted me. Well that downward spiral went on for almost two years and in those two years not only did I devour comfort food by the trough I discovered something else that packs the pounds on lazy people...alcohol. Like most high school kids I played around with things found in the parents liquor cabinets and conned older siblings into buying booze for us.

Things began to change for me Sophomore year of high school. I found another outlet of expressing myself. I joined the drama club at my high school and found solace in pretending to be someone else for a while. The drinking stopped but my eating was still out of control. Another factor I think that lead to my atrocious diet were my brothers. I was around boys 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. I had and have two brothers, all boy cousins and mostly male friends. So watching the guys shovel in these mass amounts of crap food made me think I could do it too! Right?!? Hahhahahahahhahahaha you've got to learn to laugh at your own stupidity because otherwise we'd cry. Yeah no, its proven that men need more calories because they burn more. They're bigger and most of the time stronger than we are. (I now work at a gym so yes my feminist friends I know there are women out there who could break men. I'm one of them!) So learning I couldn't do what the boys did and stay as flippin skinny as them was a real eye opener as well. But then something happened, it was a small thing. A small comment from someone I love more than life that set me over the edge. My Papaw, the greatest granddad in the world, and I were talking one day. We were looking at the baby pictures of all the grandkids and I made one of those silly comments like "Ohhh wasn't I cute as a kid...what happened? hahaha" It was a joke, the other grandkids said stuff like that all the time. Well, you know how someone can say something, anything and it can stick with you forever?? Well my Papaw's response did. I will never in all my years forget this. He said to me "You just got too big Annie" (insert shocked face here) No one had ever been that honest with me about how I looked. Of course there had been constant teasing and mean spirited kids from elementary all the way to high school but never blunt honesty. That changed everything!

In January 2003 I started my first in an endless ring diets.I began with the Atkins diet...we all know where this is headed. Lots of meat, lots of veggies, lots of quick and unsustainable weight loss. Then came South Beach, basically the same thing with a few exceptions and then it was Weight Watchers. Now those people got it right! Eat healthier, watch your portions and exercise! Well I could totally do the eat right thing. I learned to love some healthy food! Grilled chicken, endless veggies and fruit, what's not to love?!?! The exercise part...Oh my God I hated exercise! Without even stepping one foot in the gym I went from a size 24 to 18 by the time I graduated high school and through college got down to a size 14. I was totally okay with that size for most of my college years, it was a vast improvement from where I had been. Then things began ticking around in my head. It seemed to me that I was always the fattest girl in the room, I was the biggest of all my friends. All my girlfriends could trade clothes except for me. Little things like this began to add up and then Senior year I noticed I had started gaining weight. I didn't gain the Freshman 15, I gained the Senior 15. It was living off campus and driving everywhere along with all the booze that did it. After graduation I began researching what to do how to do it? Then in the fall of 2009 one of my girlfriends from school, who was a little smaller than me, said she was taking these great pills and the weight was just falling off her. She was losing weight like crazy thanks to these "natural" pills. Well of course being me, I looked into it. I stopped looking after I saw the price. I pondered over this for a while, talked to my mom (a nurse) and then thought. "I can do this without the pills." My size 14 self, all 220 pounds of me was going to get into shape and not use pills!!!

January 2010 I started. I revamped my diet...yes again and I started keeping a food journal. I gave myself 1500 calories a day and logged every bite that went into my mouth. That part has been and always will be easy for me. Then the exercise came....uhhhhhhh! I made myself walk 30 minutes a day. Then over time I began jog/walk intervals. Then in the spring my friend introduced me to his workout BOXING!!!!!!!!!!!!! Boxing changed my life. It was exercise that I loved! After I got boxing down we did running intervals. Then in December of 2011 my relationship with my friend ended abruptly (personal reasons I dont wish to disclose on the internet) and I had to find another exercise outlet.

I always said that I will never, ever, never be a runner....guess what? I'M A RUNNER! I love it! There is nothing as freeing as throwing on some shoes, sticking in some headphones and running until your heart gives out (not literally). Running became my solace in a really hard time. My relationship ending was the most painful and upsetting thing I had dealt with since the death of my father. This time I found a healthy outlet, exercise! It helped me survive, its helped me thrive and exercise has even lead me to new job opportunities.

I can proudly say that the girl whose BMI in high school was in the morbidly obese range is now considered an athlete. My body fat is 19.6% and I worked every damn bit of it off with blood sweat and tears. I'm not an expert, I'm not even a licensed trainer (not yet anyway hehehe) but there are things I know and can share with you if anyone is interested. I did it with guts and sheer will and learning that there is nothing too big to conquer. If I can do it anyone can.

(Oh and a side note...yes I know I have horrible grammar and spelling. If I mess up forgive me)

Love, Annie